The media is filled with advertisements for romantic gifts, stories about the cute ways couples met, and adorable marriage proposals. For those without partners, however, it's another reminder of the unshared lives they lead.
It's not the same as loneliness. Your life can be filled with friends and acquaintances, you can enjoy professional success, and for some that can be enough. But I believe humans are pack animals of a sort, meant to be with other humans in a shared environment. Call it a marriage, a family, a village, whatever; the term used matters less than the sense of belonging you enjoy.
I was struck tonight by a story on The Last Word about the state of Washington legalizing gay marriage. State representative Maureen Walsh -- a conservative Republican, by the way -- gave an eloquently personal speech in favor, relating her own years of marriage to the plight of gays and lesbians, including her own daughter, who merely want to share the same kind of commitment with another human being. Denying them the right to form such a bond, she said, was just cruel.
When I consider my own experiences, including a marriage, I cannot imagine being so cruel as to deny those experiences to others. My marriage ended in a divorce, and so will some of those of same sex couples. That's sad, of course, but much sadder is to deny anyone the opportunity to make a go of it simply because of their sexual orientation.
Life is too short and much too hard to make it worse by denying love to anyone. If you don't like gay marriage, don't enter into one. But let those who have found the love of their life enjoy the fullness of that love. Domestic partnerships and civil unions won't cut it. For better or worse, richer or poorer, marriage should be open to all who dare to commit to it.
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